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YUI JIA MIN
IS SUPERMAN
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Profile 
shuqun primary. (1996 - 2002)fuhua secondary. (2003 - 2006) itedover. (2008-2009) maro1233@hotmail.com 27 DEC 1990  ● Tagboard
WISHLISTS
THING I WANT AND GET OVER. -Getting over the word "SPRAIN ANKLE"!!! -Getting over caterpillar and sidper. -Having the most awesome 21st birthday party. -Having a BAPOK girlfriend. -EMPORIO ARMANI PHONE. -RC JET SKI boat sail model water! -SHIH TZU! -iPAD2<3 Twitter
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.BELOVED OF ALL LOVES =).LOVES. BRO <3 myaiai darling deardear brother Archives
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Credits
©Glamouresque. |
Monday, August 08, 2016
Something about it. The day before, I was planning to do something that I think I should have done quite awhile ago.
I didn't know if I'm doing the right thing but I'm should that I wanted to do that.
I will not say what I've plan to do but anyway it didn't work out either.
The day after, I dream about you.
Something about this dream with you is I could not remember a single thing but I do know that it was you.
Everyone around me would ask, are you not over it yet after for so long?
My answer, I really don't know.
I don't know if I'm over it or not, I don't know if I miss you or not.
But each time I do hope that somehow, out of somewhere we do meet again.
I don't know if it's hate or those feelings that you miss someone.
Being together back then, and hoping that we will get back together right now is a different thing.
I do know that you are with someone else now.
Why did you even start to go back to where you actually wanted to forget?
I thought that you actually wanted to forget that you were once in this kind of relationship?
When I saw you with a guy, I felt happy for what you're doing right now.
It kinda made me feel that whatever I've do back then was totally worth something, at least I know that you really know what you want.
But after looking at you right now, I felt kinda..
There is a saying, sometimes there will be this person in your life that you could never forget.
I totally believe in that.
It's funny that we did not have much good memories between us, either it was long enough to remember anything but I do know that you are someone that hurt me the most until now.
It's that hurt that maybe I couldn't get over I guess?
At some point of my life, I do stop and take a look at you.
I wish I could know what is the reason behind that I'm still here.
Sunday, January 03, 2016
Looking back, i could still feel the hurt. Entry no 2, Finally i know whats the other stuff you bought for me. A billabong wallet and i could still even remember how it looks like. (Didnt know where is it now) Reading forward, a chalet, your sister chalet. I totally would not remember this if i didnt wrote it in my blog. Like wow, thats really long and i could still remember where and how it looks like. Fighting to find the air con remote, lying next to each other talking nonsense that i cant recall. Hahaha. I dont even remember why did i kept a glass bottle fill with nothing inside and its because those m&m chocolate in it melted damn badly cause i refuse to eat them. And thats is what left, a empty bottle. Reading on, i found out myself that ive made 520 straw hearts?! And a bottle fill with toothpick each and everyone of it was fill with " i love you". Clearly i remember that it was after my basketball match, i guess it took me 2 days to complete? How i wish i knew where my nokia 6260 went. Because 1 of the post state that you wrote me a message long saying i love you just to assure me that you do, last time i mean. We use to have a piglet a small one with the ring on it. I still remember how the piglet looks like. And yes, finally today i recall that pair of ring. I was that idiot who actually bought that pair of ring. I was so stupid back then because i didnt know your finger size and i ask my friend to lend me her finger BUT in the end the ring is still too big for you. Movies like 49 days, after the movie still fighting whos gonna get that little girl. And movies that i fell asleep which was a very lame movie. We would spend our dates on movies. I still recall that you wish you were my best friend so that you could be next to me all the time? Because we hardly meet each other like worst 1 month? I wish that i could had spend more time back then but i couldnt understand why i didnt do that because its just a ride away from each other and back then i dont have to go home early and stuff. There was once i ask you who is more important to you, me or your best friend? Your answer was so nice that you reply : your best friend could give you somethings that i could not give and i could give you things that your best friend could not give. Slowly as i was reading it month by month, i felt that i was so "emo" back there. I will use the word childish to myself. For almost a year ive been waiting for a return of nothing. I still remember i would let my life down back there just to slack with my friends, letting my exam blank and get nothing. Family stop talking to me and slowly i lag out from the word call "family". Slacking with friends asking what i should do, stubborn on not letting this relationship go. 99 roses, everyday non stop, thinking when should i give that to you. Even my sister was there to support me for giving it as a last try. I could only recall it was given at orchard but where i could not remember. I still remember how unwillingly you were to actually meet me and i felt that it was done, its over. I would have lie to myself if i say that i didnt hate you. I do. I could feel that pain even until now by just reading it back. I didnt know that it would take me so long to get over you. And i recall me crying almost everyday, reading back those messages from my old nokia phone. I could remember those night my eyes are wide open thinking what should i do. In the day time i had my friends and i was fine all with them but in the nighttime it was a nightmare to me, every night. Everyday back then, i would ask and bother my friends, what had i done wrong back there. Everyday im blaming myself, stressing myself over this question. I would break down in front of my friend crying damm badly over this relationship. I could play maple happily for this moment and next moment i would turn out tearing in front of the computer with some stupid music reminding me of you that my friend would stop and try to cheer me up. For almost 1 year im stuck like this. My old computer keyboard would have flooded with my tears back there. Haha. But a side note, its damm childish to keep cursinh "guy" and stuff. Scolding, cursing half of my life. Hahaha. Im sorry that i kept holding on to you for so long. Bothering you for almost a year. Sorry that i kept cursing that guy name "alvin" which totally i cant recall anything about this guy. Sorry for being so damm childish. I wish that i was more mature back then to think better. Causes you so much trouble staying at your house downstairs or carpark doing stupid stuff. Sorry after 10 years later. Haha. At least i could think better now. At least im not crying now writing this post. Wednesday, December 30, 2015
After years later, I'm back here again. Reading the post years back ago makes me laugh, like really laugh. Didn't know that this ahbeng or ahlian style of typing a blog could be so funny. So funny that i don't even understand some stuff that i wrote myself. I choose not to delete this blog nor those posts that i blog before reason was maybe someday i might come back here to read all those funny memories of mine and recall those time. Time cannot be rewind therefor there is memories. Of course, i did not just come back here out of nowhere. I dream about you, often. And this is not the first time, those dream are so real that i would wake up recalling every single thing, those feeling are so real that you were beside me. 10 years and this 10 years i would have lie to myself saying that i did not miss you. How fast could 10 years be. Well. Its kinda sick that i would say i have been stalking on you. Or maybe not to use the word stalk but randomly check on you. Lets start all here. the first ever time i check on you was the first time we became friends in Facebook. From there, i got to know what school you went to after your secondary school and you started to know your new friend there. One of them name Lola which was her Facebook name. Fade does not just stop there, this bring me to zouk. Back then, me and my friends would go to zouk, rebel, powerhouse and etc…. Zouk was clearly the place i remember. I saw you first and clearly i still can remember where and your face. You were standing at the bar, i was shock that i would see you again. I do not know which friend you went with but clearly it was you. You have change, that was my first word that came out from my mind. The schoolgirl that i would think the least place to have met you was in the club. My heart did sink for awhile but i just told myself that its the last. Saw you in the toilet, sitting near the bag counter and stuff. All this things that i should have forget, every single one. Rebel, how silly of me to see you there. Rebel of course. standing at the bar ordering something called " the flamming stuff". That Flamming stuff was Flamming lambo of course. That time i did not know that was this drink thanks to you. Drinking that Flamming stuff. But i wasn't sure if you did saw me there. But yes, i was. On my 18th birthday, i told my friend that i would wanna try that Flamming stuff that you drunk, so i order 1 of it just to see, how could a so called use to be a schoolgirl doing in the club. So i did have mine, a Flamming Lambo and a Waterfall of course. How funny, i was standing firm in the dance floor for another 3 hours till the club was close. 3pm, Rebel close, so did i. Dead drunk of course. I would not know this drink or shots thank to you. Plaza sing, that would be the next place that i saw you. But i just avoid myself from seeing you as singapore is not so big, its not hard to actually get to see one again. Till i stop straight club and i really wanted to just move on with you. It just didn't stop right there, there were times that i dream about you beside me again. Those feelings that when you wake up you could still feel them warming your heart. The smile that i could not forget, the voice of yours were still in my head. Clearly 1 thing i do remember was its always in a train, always. I still could remember every single thing when i went back to read my older post. The first ever time, we met was at mac. I still remember how in love i was the first time i saw you with those short hair of yours. But i would never expect myself being together with you, you will be those guys would die for you kind of girls. And i was just trying my luck because i was not sure if you were actually in this girl and girl relationship. And yes, of course we were together. Or using the word "stead". It was those normal puppy love. Puppy love that i could still really remember. Me and crystal would travel to sengkang just because of you and your best friend. Walking in orchard the 4 of us. Back then, you and your best friend doesn't like people who smoke. There i was and crystal. I remember that you and your best friend would walk in front and the 2 of us smoking at the back. Hate, i think that will be the word. New year count down we was with our working staff. Couldn't really remember their name. But clearly i remember that it was at esplanade. A staircase, spiral staircase. We were talking, laughing and all due to the rain. We used to watch movie in shaw house. And only shaw house. Talk everyday on the phone till you fall asleep, messaging each other during class. We would stay out late just to talk to each other and nothing to worry about? Those times. Clearly distance was a big problem when we were young. Do you still remember that we used to study in macdonalds for exams? But sadly, mine went to drain. I did not even turn up for N levels. We had a pair of ring. But that photo won't open up in here anymore because i can't remember we had a pair of ring before. I still have those photo we took in bus. Do you still remember? Those days that i fell asleep in playground but where i can't remember. You didn't even dare to move because you are afraid that you will wake me up and ended up with mosquito bites all over? You bought me a black and gold nike bag, guess what i didn't throw that bag away even though the leather came out but yes i still have it with me. I remember its a bag and something else came together with it. But i can't remember what was it. You would get jealous over a campus superstar, teresa. We even quarrel over her. Joke right? All this details, 10 years ago. And yes i still remember. Until this say, somebody told you that girl and girl relationship does not work out, our distance is a problem for us. Things starts to go out of track. But i could not remember the reason why. I could only remember that girl and girl relationship doesn't work out. Yes, it doesn't work out. The is no future to it. Future? What kind of future are you looking at actually? Yes, there will be no marriage, no children and its a no future thing. But then, love is just love. It doesn't need to be a boy and girl and thats future, thats love. Its all about how you feel inside you, your heart. Im not here to actually asking anything, so do not misunderstood me. But hey, time change people right? Smoking doesn't mean that you're a bad person. Distance was never a problem. Use to hate or dislike the smell of smoke? And ended up, being together with someone who smoke? Use to think that distance was problem? Never again. Im sorry for what I've done to you or hurt you in any ways. Im sorry for just everything. But i was here today to say that i just do remember everything. And yes, everything. eighteen12 dearestdearest. |
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anyone can catch your eye,
but is takes someone special to catch your heart |
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